25.2.06

State of Confusion

I find myself with totally nothing to do these days. I've run out of interesting things to read on the internet so I used this opportunity to catch up on the things that are going on. Apparently last Friday the president declared us to be under a state of emergency. I was asleep so I didn't know that until now. Funny thing is nobody at home even bothered to wake me up to tell me. My mom, the queen of freaking out in my universe, just shrugged it off when I asked her about it. Hmmm... Strange... I was expecting her to give us a lecture on not staying out late but we've had none of that. I've received no texts messages from my friends about this situation at all... as in zero...

In one of the articles I read a politician was saying that all of us Filipinos should put placards in front of our houses or use our blogs to tell the President that we vehemently oppose this declaration.

I'd love to do that sir but unfortunately, I don't exactly know what to make of any of this. I mean, this whole situation sucks cause I'm sure that it's just gonna do wonders for our economy but if it stops the incessant whining even for just 5 minutes, I'll take it.

Ok. Lets say you guys are successful in overthrowing Arroyo's presidency, what then? Who's gonna take over? Well, I'm sure that whoever's lucky enough to end up with the job, it's gonna take you a maximum of 1 month to find some dirt on that person too and this whole thing begins again. It just seems to me that ALL of you want to be president so you're never gonna be happy unless the person staying in Malacañang is you. And if that parliamentary thing pushes through, I'm sure it's gonna be hilarious. I can see it now... Every year there's gonna be a vote of "no confidence" thrown at the prime minister, so every year we're gonna have a different prime minister.

I just think it's about that you guys just shut up and put up... Yes, I know it's a bad thing that we have a president who's not exactly perfect but who is... You... I don't think so...

I think it's interesting to see that people aren't freaking out about this declaration after all these years of resisting any type of charter change for fear of another "martial law". Coz this whole thing sounds a lot like martial law to me.

posted by jeanne @ 21:16 0 comments

24.2.06

Outbreak?

Last night I had a couple of drinks with Ms. (Usually) Sensible.

Ms. (Usually) Sensible is suffering of pseudo-happiness at the moment, a condition which, I find, somewhat diminishes the usualness of her sensibility. I empathize with her completely, of course. After all, I just recently recovered from a similar disease though I just have to say that I'm not exactly ecstatic about the fact that my illness did nothing to dampen my cynicism. If anything, I think it only intensified it.

We sat there at same table where I could very well have contracted the things that caused the necessity for me to undergo treatment. hehe. I listened to my friend rant and rave and I thought to myself: "I am sooo glad that I've been cured." Though I'm very happy for her, I'm glad that I'm not in her situation right now.

But I only hope for the best for you, my dear friend and I have all the time in the world to devote to "being there" for you and listen to whatever crazy things you have to say because I have no intention whatsoever of "being there" for her.

posted by jeanne @ 10:41 0 comments

17.2.06

Prophet Protests

These events came about...

Because of This:

A few days ago I saw part of a news report about a protest that happened in Makati in front of P.B. Com Tower. The protest was about the caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad that were published by the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten in September of last year.

I was waiting for them to show the actual drawings that caused the protest but they didn't. The next day I looked through the newspapers that my dad bought. I found articles about the protest but didn't see the drawings there either. I thought this was extremely weird. Why would they report about something and not show what caused it?

I got curious so I went on the internet coz I figured that maybe American news websites would have the cartoons but the said images were surprisingly hard to find. Usually when a story is this big, you get to see it from the first result that Google gives you. Like when that Janet Jackson Superbowl thing happened a few years ago, I was able to see a video of that and all I had to type in Google was Janet Jackson without even using quotes. Anyway, most of the results that the first of my searches gave me were just articles about what was happening around the world as a reaction to these cartoons and I figured out why these pictures were a little bit hard to find.

I get what the protests are all about. I’d be upset too if something I believed in so dearly was being equated to terrorism. I even somewhat welcome the one that occurred in Makati because no one got hurt there. This was the first rally that I heard about that I wasn’t rolling my eyes at. Gosh, finally, something other than “Hello Garci”. Sure as hell makes more sense than the “Stampede sa Ultra Kasalan ni Gloria” thing. What I don’t get is why did the whole of Denmark become the target? Wasn’t it just a single newspaper that initially published the cartoons? I mean, ok, do the protests (minus the violence, of course) and send out the message that it was extremely insensitive and disrespectful for that newpaper to publish those pictures but to call for a boycott of ALL Danish products just seems a bit excessive.

Here’s a scary question: How come our newspapers aren’t showing the cartoons when it’s causing all of this hoopla? Think about this: Religions are criticized all the time. Why are we walking on eggshells when it comes to Islam?

How come I can watch a play called “Jesus Christ Superstar”, where there is a suggestion of a “wink-wink” thing going on between Jesus (you know Jesus Christ? As in the Son of God Himself, not just a prophet) and Mary Magdalene (there’s also a movie that has sort of the same thing going on called The Last Temptation of Christ) or go to video city and rent a copy of the movie DOGMA for just 17Php but to this day, I haven’t seen a single Newspaper nor any prominent news outfits here in the Philippines re-print the cartoons when it is so relevant in presenting the story of the reactions that it has induced around the world? How come that in other parts of the World some people have referred to the publishing of a picture of Muhammad sporting a bomb-shaped turban as a “hate crime” when we all have heard the terrorists say that they can bear the thought of innocent children dying from one of their bombs because they are doing it in the service Allah (this isn’t to say that I believe them nor do I think that they even know what the heck they’re talking about).

To me it just seems like these terrorists are somewhat succeeding in what they are trying to do. They have gotten us scared. Like I said religions are criticized all the time, some are even made fun of. So why all the attempts to make nice and be “sensitive” to Islamic sentiments about their religion being linked to terrorism? Maybe it’s because you can put a plastic crucifix in a vat of your urine and photograph it and say “it’s art” and not even get excommunicated but you can die from being involved in the publishing of a book. I’m sorry I don’t believe that any of this is really about Islam but the terrorists are the ones making it sound like it is every time they scream that what they are doing is Jihad.

I think this quote from an article I found pretty much sums up my sentiments about this ugly situation:

“While all the world’s major religions -- Judaism, Christianity, Catholicism, and Hinduism – shoulder responsibility for fueling extremist factions spewing hatred, violence and intolerance, Muslims do need to drop the victimization act and realize that just as they condemn and judge others with impunity, so too must they learn to cope with being subject to criticism.

Until people stop, in Allah's name, stoning women to death, killing homosexuals, cutting the hands off children stealing food to survive, flying passenger planes into skyscrapers, car-bombing innocent people, forcing their religious convictions onto others, and other such atrocities, and until Muslims loudly and clearly reject and condemn the violence perpetrated by those who have hijacked and perverted their religion, the likelihood of cartoonists depicting Muhammad as a gentle, olive-branch carrying dove is not particularly high.”

--taken from an article on annoy.com

All this hate is getting all of us nowhere. Such a shame that after millions of years of evolution that we still have not come up with a better way to solve disagreements than "my stick is bigger that yours."

Some articles the you might find interesting:

The Story Behind The Drawings
The Editor and The 12 Cartoons
The Muhammad Drawings
Holocaust Cartoon Contest In Iran

protest photos are from foxnews.com and Michelle Malkin

posted by jeanne @ 11:40 0 comments

14.2.06

Back From Batanes

I'm back from Batanes. Dude, if your flight was delayed, I had to take a non-air conditioned, suspension-busted-from-lack-of-maintenance bus to get back here. Oh and I even had to sit at the back of that stupid bus cause I arrived late because I was trying so hard not to leave Batanes. Translation: my trip was mainit, matagtag, at nakakasuka (hot, bumpy, and puke-inducing).

For the past few weeks I've been having a theme thing goin’ here. As a grand finale I'm gonna write about the things I said that I couldn't write about before.

The story itself doesn't matter. It's the same thing that seems to happen to me time and time again. What's interesting is how I'm reacting to the fact that I am, most definitely, back in Manila. Three years ago, when I was in sort of the same situation, I locked myself up in my room, picked up a guitar and tried desperately to play that song "So Much In Love" by Sheena Easton but failed to finish the damn song even once because I kept on bursting into tears whenever it was time to sing the chorus. It would always go like this: I'd be singing "... I know that it's too late for me... the o... (Silence and then...) waaaah...huhuhu... So pathetic, I know but that was what kept on happening. But now, I don't even feel sad. To be perfectly honest, when I found out about and accepted it, what I felt was relief. All that went through my mind was "Great! Looks like she's gonna be with someone soon and he seems like a nice enough guy... w/c means... I can give up now." I think I even smiled.

I guess I just feel that sadness just isn't a proportionate reaction to what happened and crying while singing would just be overly dramatic. Come to think of it I can't really say "the only love I've ever wanted" because I know, for a fact, that this was NOT "THE ONLY" love I ever wanted because there was one (or two… hehe) before it. And even if I wanted to sing about this, I wouldn't be able to because nobody writes songs about situations as non-remarkable as this. This isn’t to say that it was totally meaningless, I mean, she did almost make me get off my ass and try to take some form of action but I just don’t think my continued presence in that life is at all necessary. In the greater scheme of things, the difference that I made was but a mere blip.

I just hope that all this failure isn't getting to me. I've noticed that it has become easier for me to get over people. It took me 4 years the first time, 2 for the second time and now I'm down to 1. Not 1 year but 1 week and I don't want to be like that. But then again maybe the entire thing was indeed just an overreaction on my part, though I'd rather look at this as me finally knowing when to quit, knowing to give up before something totally destroys me.

That being said, I still think and will forever say that I had a blast while I was in Batanes. I was never bored while I was there and I'm looking forward to going back there. I just hope next time I won't just be visiting. harhar.

posted by jeanne @ 17:47 0 comments

13.2.06

Theme Song

Well if you're happy
then I'm blue
Coz I'm not... so far...
but not with you

And I can't see
Why we can't see each other
I telephone
but you're sleepin forever

I hate you
For the things you do
but I love you
And curse you for your beauty
that makes me make some poetry
about love
And I don't think
You even think about me
If only you were smiling
if I was your reason
tomorrow I could die

I can only pray
my absence will change you
pretend that you're the one
who needs my love (needs my love)

But you celebrate
'coz yes why should you miss me?
oh when you know darn well
I'd die
Just to bring (keep) us together

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG
DON'T EVEN THINK IT'S YOUR SONG

posted by jeanne @ 02:34 1 comments

12.2.06

Mishka Adams

I absolutely adore her. I found her album in the same mp3 cd that had Romancing Venus on it that my friend got. Gosh, I neverliked jazz before. It always made me want to fall asleep but I love listening to this girl sing. Too bad I don't have a job right now so I can't exactly go out and watch her perform live and I think she's in London anyway. Aaaargh. Why the hell was I not watching TV 8 months ago? If only I was, I would've known that she had a gig at Eastwood. Eastwood!!! That darn place is only 20 mins. away!!! And I just found out that she did an album launch thingee at Marikina Riverbanks which is even closer to my house. Bad trip talaga!!!

My sister says that it's actually possible that that the radio station she's working for or a sponsor might invite her to do a show in Boracay this summer. Gosh, if this is true then I am gonna start saving up now so that I can go with them. I figured all I would have to worry is the plane fare. I know my sister and I ain't exactly chummy but I'm hoping she'd at least let me crash in her hotel room. She couldn't possibly bear to have me sleep on the beach, right? But then again... hmm...

Anyway check out her album, please!!! I think she won either best new artist or best performance by a new artist at the AWIT awards for it. Apparently there was some sort of controversy about it because she beat the likes of Kitchie Nadal and Nina for that award and some idiots were wondering if she was even Filipino. She IS Filipino. Actually, half Filipino, half British but have you heard her speak tagalog? I couldn't get my hands on any audio clips but take a look at this quote I found:

-- When she was asked whether she preferred her gigs in Q.C. this is what she said:

"Yeah I do. I have a little difficulty with Makati crowds... they're not really a listening crowd. It's so different. I dunno, nahihirapan ako. They're a lot louder, talking to each other. They're not very interested, well maybe at the moment - 'cause we hardly ever play there yet. But in Quezon City, people are really there, they really listen... after the solos, they'll really clap. So it's nice when I introduce the musicians - like our keyboardist Ria for example - then they'll go "Whooo!” But in Makati it's like, "Ha? Ano daw? Bakit? Ba't hindi na kumakanta?" (LAUGHS)

"Naku, hala, siguro pag lumabas yan, wala nang manunuod sakin (LAUGHS) But - it's true, di ba?"

Awwww... Isn't she just absolutely lovable?

No official website yet but I found the pictures and some articles at the Candid Records Philippines website.

*uhm... pano ba format ng footnote? whatever... basta... I got the quote from www.philmusic.com

posted by jeanne @ 20:17 1 comments

11.2.06

Instead of Going To Class...

Last Thursday I watched my friends' band audition at Barbariba. It was great. We got a bit drunk so my friend got this crazy idea to just walk from the bar all the way to EDSA instead of taking a cab and I agreed. Good thing that guard was there to tell us that it would be better if we walked on the other side of Macapagal since the other side of the highway was well lit and there were bars and hotels there so it would be much safer. Duh! Why didn't we think of that? I guess alcohol + pain really does numb the brain.

That Lovapalooza thing is tonight. Good thing I don't have plans tonight because I bet that traffic would be a killer. I notice that I usually don't have places to go during weekends. Some might think that's so sad but I'm actually liking it. I even have TV shows that I watch out for again. Maybe I really am getting old. Most days I'd really rather stay home and chill. When I do go out, I prefer it if my friends and I just go to a quiet place where we can either have coffee or drinks and just talk.

Speaking of quiet places to go, you might want to check out that Barbariba place. The food and drinks are reasonably priced and the service is pretty good. It's near the CCP or within the CCP complex. Just ask around. Until next time...

posted by jeanne @ 18:19 0 comments

10.2.06

Batanes: A Semi-fictional Account of How A City Became A Figure of Speech

Ms. Cynical: Dude, there are so many things that I want to tell you but it'll just take too much effort if I'm going to tell you through a text message. But I will tell you this: this week has been the happiest week of my entire life. I got to spend so much time with her this week. I'm so happy and yet I'm scared to death. Scared because I know that there's nowhere to go but down from here. I'm an ungrateful idiot, I know! But I just know how much I'm gonna miss this when this is all over.

Ms. (Usually) Sensible: Just enjoy things while you still have it. It's like when you go to Batanes.

Ms. Cynical: Huh?

Ms. (Usually) Sensible: Apparently Batanes is just this great place. I heard that it's sooo beautiful there. So while you're there, enjoy the sights, man. Don't lock yourself up in your hotel room and obsess about making plans about what you're going to do with yourself when it's time to go back home.

Ms. Cynical: But wouldn't it have been better if I did not know what I was missing in the first place. If I hadn't gone to Batanes then I wouldn't have known how great it is there so I eliminate the potential of feeling inconsolable despair when it's time to leave. Right?

Ms. (Usually) Sensible: But if you were in Batanes and truly enjoyed being there, wouldn't you think it was all worth it?

posted by jeanne @ 08:28 0 comments

9.2.06

What's Goin On

I've updated the website version of this blog. You might wanna check it out: jadedjeanne.farvista.net. You'll find pretty much the same stuff there that you can find here. The only difference is, there, you get the bonus (or should I say consolation?) of hearing some great tunes while reading about my insanity. hehe.

Through the update work that I had to do, I got to read the things that I've written recently and I noticed that most of them were all about or at least have something to do with that thing that I'm saying I dread the most. Here I am ranting about the sappiness of this stupid month yet it is all that I write about. I realize that it might be considered terribly uncool to only be able to write about love but what can I do? Not exactly my choice to have to deal with this crap while everybody else is thinking of where to take there dates on Feb 14. The commercials of that stupid movie "I Will Always Love You" might be getting to me. Aaargh. But I suppose its o.k. Consider it as me trying to have a theme thing going here. And anyway, IT’S A BLOG and I'm not even a writer. Not exactly gunning for a Pulitzer Prize here, you know?

Too bad I wasn't a blogger three years ago. Because if I was, you, my lone reader would've had the pleasure of reading about this idiot who was hysterically crying in someone's arms while they were in a cemetery during all soul's day in front of a grave a person she did not even know with her little brother right there, watching, happily eating "isaw" while trying very hard not to laugh at the sight of his adult sister who could only stop bawling like a baby to utter stuff like "why him? huhuhu....", But then again, if you are reading this nonsense then I probably know you personally so it's a safe bet that you know all about that. I probably even gave you a live re-enactment of that event.

And anyway, I'm pretty sure that all of this yuccchy mush-mush stuff will have run out by this month's end. (*Wink Wink*) Oh and speaking of which, I'm almost done with my M.T. classes. I'm so excited! I can't wait for it to be finally over since I can finally start doing something productive again… among other things of course… harhar :p (*Wink Wink* ulet).

posted by jeanne @ 06:13 0 comments

8.2.06

Romancing Venus

I stumbled upon this album when a friend got this mp3 cd from another friend and this album just happened to be in it. The tracks are actually poems by Kooky Tuason interpreted by women from different fields. She had singers, actors, radio personalities, etc. sing or read the poems for the album. My favorite track on this album is "FLAME", read by Wawi Navaroza of Late Isabel

The candle flame
That scorched my skin
In pain
Is you

Red,
Angry,
Full of room
To burn
Idealistic hearts
To ashes
Sweeping clean
My clear vision
Of lovers true

I toast to brew
Viewing my skin and my heart
Burned by you

Side Kwento: I have a major crush on this Wawi girl now. I just love the way she read the poem. And I also adore Monique Jaramillo, she came up with that line in Track 25 she said "I love, him, he is my music in human form". I have this thing for women who are amazing when it comes to speaking. I have no idea why. It's sooo weird! Let me tell you... I went gaga over my learning lab supervisor when I was working for this company. She wasn't gorgeous but she wasn't bad looking either. I'd say she'd pass for slightly more than cute but still not the type who would turn people's heads just by merely walking into a room. Let me put it to you this way... She ain't "Cindy Kurleto" but man,,, if you hear her speak... you will thank the Lord for the ability to hear.

One night my nose was buried in this test, she passed by my station and while my back was turned so I wasn't able to see her she said "I like your Jacket" while slightly pulling on the hood. I don't know what happened but I felt "kilig" right then and I was so freaked out all I could come up with as a response was "uhm, kase yellow..."

Since that thing happened, I, the poster child for schedule adherence delinquency of call center agents, was only late once and had a great internal struggle over using my 1 allowed (as in allowed ha, as in your excuse could be that you needed to water your plants and you still would not get in trouble) absence to watch a friend's gig just because it would take away one day of my being able to listen to her pre-shift talks.

Anyway, what I find most interesting about this album is that the women were given free reign in choosing which poems they want to interpret cause it sort of gives you insight on what's going on in their heads based on what the poems that appealed to them were about. So you get an idea on how they are as real people. hehe. I'd make for a very scary stalker don't you think?

This album was released middle of last year and part of the proceeds will benefit the Women's Crisis Center. According to the articles I read it's available at M1 and Powerbooks stores but I was able to find a copy at Odyssey so I suppose you can get it at any record store now.

For more information you can visit this site: www.venusinorbit.com.

posted by jeanne @ 03:22 0 comments

7.2.06

Suckfest

This month totally sucks. It's worse than December with its merry-ness and goodwill crap. And to think that Valentine's Day is not even an actual holiday. Everywhere you go it's all about love. Grrrrh. Kakainis… Sobra!!!

If during Christmas I turn into the Grinch, during Valentine's I turn into that guy who appeared on one episode of Ally McBeal. Remember that guy who went around smacking people on the head with a bat whenever he thought that they were in love? I become like him except I don't do it to make them realize that they are in love, I just want to smack them, period.

You can accuse me of being bitter but the truth is that I just don't understand what the fuss is all about! Can you explain to me why the traffic is so bad during Valentine's Day? Doesn't matter if the actual day falls on a Monday when you expect people to just stay home because they obviously have to go to work the next day, na-ah, every one is out... on a date. So if you're unlucky enough to be working in a call center and have to work at night, you have to leave home to go to work at least 2 hours earlier than usual. Oh... and good luck trying to find a cab.

posted by jeanne @ 11:50 0 comments

6.2.06

I Need A Shrink...

About 4 days ago I went nuts. Now I know some people who have known me for quite a while might argue that I have been crazy since the day they met me but I really believe that I had a mental breakdown several days ago. I'm not exactly sure how it happened but I took one look at her walking away from me with that guy and I just lost it and I did something very, very horrible.

I should've just gone postal. I should've picked up every beer bottle within sight and should've just started to systematically smash them on this guy’s head but no... I had to do something much, much worse...

I started to think that I could do something to stop "this" from happening...

I thought that if this guy thinks I'm just gonna take this lying down then he's got another thing comin'. Mwehehe. This could very well have been the stupidest and looniest idea that I've had in my entire life because there is absolutely nothing that I can do to stop it. I could come up with the solution to world hunger tomorrow and it still wouldn't make a bit of a difference, at least, not the way I want it to. I bet even the most optimistic person in the world can take a look at this situation and say that nothing short of divine intervention can help me come out victorious in this war. And since based on every religion that I am aware of, even God himself (...or herself for some people) can't possibly be on my side on this one, it is safe to assume that I'm nothing but screwed.

Sorry guys, false alarm. I thought I had it in me but I don't. The whole make "da moves" thing is just sooo not me. I thought long and hard about the things that happened last Friday and though it wasn't bad, it just didn't sit well with me. Come to think of it if I really care as much as I claim I do then I should realize that I can't be with anyone when my mind is this freaky.

Oh... and I've also realized that what I really want, I will never ever get as long as the need to ask questions still exist. So, since we live in a world wherein you can't get answers unless you ask questions and since most of the time people in my situation don't even get the opportunity to ask then I think it's best that I just give up and hope that I am given the opportunity to do what I do best... the whole "just being there for her" thing.

It's no big deal anyway. If it’s not him then it's going to be somebody else that I don't even know. It's actually better if ends up being him though. This way, if he does something stupid and ends up hurting her in any way, it will be easier for me to lure him into a secluded area and show him what the word "vivisection" means :p

posted by jeanne @ 03:25 0 comments

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